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the nasty side of blogging

What in the world is going on?

Maybe I am just so naive, or just plain old dumb, but I really don’t get what I see happening in the blog community.  The Christian blog community, mind you.

There are a few blogs I just love to read. I try to be selective about what I read, and how much time I spend on the computer.  Otherwise I’d be sitting here all day.  Most of the blogs I read are on my sidebar.  These are precious friends who encourage me, inspire me, and always point me toward Jesus. Such a blessing.

Then, there just a handful of other blogs that I check in on every now and then when I have a minute.  Amazing woman who serve God and try their darndest to raise their families in the ways of the Father.  Just like me, and all of us, they try

Recently I have noticed that so many of these nice woman have come up against a lot of meanness!  I mean sinful, horrible, backstabbing, foul, uncalled for and inexcusable comments.  I see it happening more and more frequently.

Yesterday I read a blog where an appeal is being made for finances for her family.  They are in a miserable situation and need help.  A guest post was done by someone very prominent in the blogging community. I’m sure many of you read it.  I felt like the appeal was done in love and with much grace.  In the appeal, a heartfelt plea was made to ‘please do not comment if you have anything negative to say’.

Like that worked!

I sat reading through some of the comments last night.  I was absolutely horrified at the things I read.  Women in their masses have gone out of their way to literally rip this family to pieces.  What I was reading made me feel horrible.  Most of these fine commenters, of course, claiming to be lovers of the same God I serve.  What?  They questioned every post she has posted, and everything she has stood for over the last several years.  Everything!  They were like a bunch of hungry piranhas on a feeding frenzy.

Needless to say, I left that blog with a sick feeling in my stomach.

It all feels so wrong to me.  Is there something wrong with making appeals for things on blogs? Blogging is community.  The reality of it is that some day we will all have some kind of need.  It is humbling enough having to ask for funds to adopt a child–but to appeal for help when you’re in a crisis situation.  THAT takes courage.  And then to find out that most of your readers have just been waiting for an opportunity to tear you to pieces.  Oh my goodness gracious…so not right.  My prayer for the ‘piranhas’ is that they never, ever, not once, ever find themselves in a similar situation where they actually have to ask for something.

I just don’t get it, dear friends.  I don’t get mean people.  I don’t get why anyone would go to such lengths to try and hurt people (they don’t even know personally) intentionally.  What good does it do to post a negative comment on someone’s blog?  Is it rewarding?  Does it feel good?

Now, I am all for people respectfully disagreeing in comments.  I don’t think any blogger expects all their readers to agree with their take on things.  That’s life.  But there is a difference in being respectful versus outright meanness.

None of us are perfect.  None of us claim to be!  I have never read any Christian blog where the author has claimed to have life all figured out.  All bloggers that I know are so open and so transparent with their lives. I hate the thought that someday, they too, may attract the meanies out there.

Having been involved in ministry over the years, all this reminds me so much of Church.  How many cynical people there are sitting in church seats, lying in wait for the pastor to say one little thing they disagree with.  Heaven help that dear pastor because without a doubt he will hear ALL about it. 

Ugh.

We should ALL have the freedom to express ourselves and our needs–whether in person or through blogging.  How sad that many bloggers feel the need to go private, or to moderate comments.   What terrible times we live in when, even as Christians, we feel such trepidation at the thought of being vulnerable.

My heart doesn’t get it, and neither does my head.  One thing I always tell my children is, “If you don’t have something kind to say, don’t say it at all.”

How I wish blog world could be that way too.

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